Penis Touch Therapy is to a Man What Retail Therapy is to a Woman

Oh yes! You got that right! I actually discovered it, or rather concluded it this morning. 

Last night the husband returned home to his wife laying in bed, eyes shut, slightly feverish with a stuffy nose, and extremely irritable.

He woke me up with the typical, “Are you sleeping?” question. This is annoying when you see someone lying on their back, stomach or either side, with their eyes closed; the odds are that they are sleeping.

I forgive the husband for doing this because really his intention is not to annoy me, but his concern seeing his always awake-busy-doing-something wife when he returns from his all boys’ office. The by-product of his concern definitely annoys me. And, I let it pass.

After waking me up, lovingly seeing I have my ginger tea with a snack he heads to the gym. He returns, buries his head into the pile of newspapers; then stares at the TV screen switching from news channels to Narcos. During all of this, it doesn’t occur to him his wife is ailing, albeit just a seasonal sinus thing with the exertion thing, with the period in the midst of peri menopause thing.

We eat dinner silently. At 9.30 pm I tell him to wake me when my milk comes. The sweet husband switches off the lights & continues his Narcos marathon; volume lowered.

10.30 he wakes me up for my turmeric milk, applies Vicks, instructs me about the Doctor and I return to my pillow and he returns to Narcos.

We follow a morning ritual. I get up, meditate and return to the bed before he wakes up. He wakes up, follows his morning routine without a wife coming in his way, and I few minutes before he leaves he wakes me to say bye.

It is a beautiful ritual we follow, as I love to send the husband to the office happy. If he is happy, he has clarity. If he has clarity he is focused. If he is focused he makes more money. If he makes more money he is extremely happy. If he is extremely happy then we shop & travel and we both are beyond happy.

Simple formula to achieve couple goals!

However, you need to add to that – newness, innovativeness and creative. Trust me, couple goals are ticked just like that.

So, the D and C procedure left me high and dry. Correction, low and dry. Creative correction low down dry, high up raging. Optimistically, it’s returning me to my virgin state. See, this tight one the husband is surely eagerly awaiting. Just need to get it wet enough!

So, in the meantime, I thought I would send him to the office happier every morning. I modified the “bye-have-nice-day-see-you-in-the-evening ritual with hug, lips-to-lips and penis stroke. Oh, that giggle from this husband, sure motivates me to keep him happy.

Truly, his giggle is a turn on.

It was the same ritual this morning with a twist. A laugh-out-loud twist. We hugged, kissed and I petted his trousered penis. He actually first heaved a sigh of relief saying, “You are feeling better, good.” Then followed the excited penis-touch-therapy giggle.

I figured, the yardstick of my wellness is me penis touch therapy for the husband. Touch it if I am healthy; ignore it if I am under the weather.

Better still, if the husband is upset then it’s penis touch Therapy for him; just as it is retail therapy for his wife.

The secret to our happy morning-have-a-great-day ritual. Try it at your own pleasure!

Anyways, I sent him a whats app message a little later in the morning saying, “When I die the last action will be my hand falling on your dick. And then, you’ll say that I am fine while I’ll be on my journey to space.” To this he replied, “Haha hahaha haha, he he Hehe❤.” A long one, I say.

Humour is our love balm, our Fevicol. It takes through every challenge, emerging us together, even stronger.